Grief is a normal and healthy response to loss. It’s what we do with our grief that’s important. We can either use it as an opportunity for growth and healing, or we can let ourselves be dragged down by it indefinitely.
The good news is that there are many different ways of coping with grief, and some of them work better than others!
| Takeaways |
|---|
| Mindfulness can be a helpful tool in managing grief by providing strategies to manage difficult emotions, reducing stress, and increasing feelings of calm and well-being. |
| Building a support system of people who can offer comfort and understanding is an important aspect of coping with grief. |
| Having a support system during times of grief can provide comfort and solace. |
| Mindfulness practices such as meditation, deep breathing, body scans, and mindful movement can help manage difficult emotions associated with grief. |
| Self-care practices are essential for managing grief and finding healing. |
Here are 15 strategies you can use to help yourself through this difficult time in your life:
Savor The Moment
You are in the present.
This is the most important thing to remember. You might be thinking about your past or future, but you’re only able to experience one moment at a time. This moment is reality, and it’s all you can work with right now.
If you become aware of your thoughts, try not to judge yourself for having them or trying to stop them just notice them as they come and go throughout the day. It’s okay if they make their appearance occasionally; just keep focusing on being present in this moment instead!
How do I focus my attention?
There are a few ways that can help you stay more focused on what’s happening right now:
Take deep breaths through your nose and exhale slowly through your mouth (20 times). This type of breathing helps calm down nervous energy so that it becomes easier for us to stay focused when we need ____(something like ‘to think clearly’).
Observe some aspect of nature around you (the trees overhead, etc.) or look at an object nearby (a pen on the desk). Try not getting distracted by anything else going on around ____(you).
Just observe what’s close by without analyzing why things look different than what they normally do; try not attaching any meaning behind it either…just observe!
“When coping with grief, it’s important to build a support system of people who can offer comfort and understanding. Our guide on how to build a support system for grief and loss can help you create a network of support that will help you navigate your grief journey.” – How to Build a Support System for Grief and Loss
Name Your Emotions
The next time you’re feeling down, take a moment to reflect on how you’re feeling. Are you sad? Angry? Nervous? Try to be as specific as possible with your emotions.
Instead of saying “I feel depressed,” try saying “I feel angry because…” or “I’m sad because…” This can help clarify what exactly is making you feel that way and allow for more specific coping methods in the future (like talking about your feelings).
It’s also important not to judge yourself for having these emotions it’s perfectly normal! Feeling grief and sadness is just part of being human.
There are many ways in which we express ourselves emotionally: crying, getting angry, even laughing at silly things we see on YouTube… whatever works best for each individual person should be used freely without any judgment or hesitation.
| Emotion | Description |
|---|---|
| Sadness | A feeling of unhappiness or sorrow that is often associated with the loss of someone or something important to you. |
| Anger | A strong feeling of displeasure or hostility towards someone or something. |
| Guilt | A feeling of responsibility or remorse over something you have done wrong. |
| Loneliness | A sense of being alone, disconnected, or isolated from others. |
| Fear | A feeling of apprehension or anxiety about something that may happen or could potentially harm you. |
Practice Acceptance Of Your Feelings
- Accept your feelings.
Even if you’re not in a great mood, try to accept that you are feeling sad, angry or confused. The more we try to push our emotions away, the more they seem to linger and become overwhelming.
- Accept that you can’t change the past.
Though it may be difficult, try not to dwell on what happened or how it could have been different—your mind will do this automatically anyway; instead of focusing on these thoughts, focus on something else (like taking deep breaths or counting backwards from 100).
By doing this, you’ll distract yourself from dwelling on painful memories and feelings while also acknowledging that they exist when they do arise (which can help them pass more quickly).
This acceptance process is called mindfulness: observing our thoughts and emotions without judgment while simultaneously feeling them fully so they don’t take over our consciousness completely (a phenomenon known as “emotional hijacking”).
Accept that things get better over time. Even though grief feels worse than anything else in life at first and even though all of us want some sort of instant relief from pain it does get better with time because we eventually adjust to living with loss by making new habits out of old ones; learning new ways to cope; finding support groups online or even within real-life communities where people share similar experiences; finding new hobbies/activities/jobs etcetera so as not stay stagnant emotionally during recovery periods.
Find support groups online/real life who share similar experiences.
Remember: It’s okay sometimes not being okay! We all need breaks once in awhile when life gets overwhelming!
“During times of grief, a support system can provide comfort and solace. Our article on the importance of having a support system during times of grief explains why having people to turn to is crucial when dealing with loss.” – The Power of a Support System During Times of Grief
Deliberately Shift Your Attention
This is a very basic exercise that anyone can do, and some people find it the most effective way to deal with the pain of grief.
To practice this technique, focus on your breath and try to ignore other thoughts that enter your mind. If you find yourself thinking about something else, gently bring attention back to breathing. It may take a little bit of practice before this becomes easier for you.
You can also try focusing on an object in front of you a wooden spoon or shoe works well and let all other thoughts fall away as you focus on it intently.
If there’s no single object in front of you, try looking at one part of your body such as an arm or leg; then focus solely on that area without letting any other thought intrude into consciousness until only the sensation remains (which will probably be painful if there’s still grief).
You can also shift attention by thinking about something positive: a positive emotion or memory; even just having a nice daydream can help distract from negative emotions caused by grief
Separate Yourself From Negative Thoughts.
Separate yourself from negative thoughts.
Don’t take them personally. You don’t have to believe everything you think and you can choose to think differently if that feels more positive.
Don’t try to control them. If a thought comes into your mind, accept it as part of being human rather than thinking it means that something is wrong with you or your life has turned for the worse forevermore and there’s nothing that can be done about it ever again because that would just make things even worse! (I know I’m mixing metaphors here.)
Don’t judge yourself for having negative thoughts. When grief strikes, we all feel like we’re going crazy sometimes; it’s normal!
| Technique | Description |
|---|---|
| Mindful breathing | Paying attention to your breath can help you stay grounded in the present moment, reducing negative thoughts and anxiety. |
| Visualization | Imagining a peaceful and happy place can help you shift your focus from negative thoughts to positive ones. |
| Positive Affirmations | Repeating positive statements to yourself can help you stay optimistic and counter negative thoughts. |
| Exercise | Getting your body moving can reduce stress and negative thoughts. |
| Talk to someone | Sharing your worries with someone can help you gain perspective and let go of negative thoughts. |
And if we don’t know how else to deal with our feelings then at least acknowledging them when they arise will help us move forward so much faster than staying stuck at one particular point in time where everything seems bleakest ever before dawn breaks again tomorrow morning when…you get the idea.
“When grieving, it’s easy to feel isolated and alone. However, having a support system can make a huge difference in how we manage our grief. Our article on the importance of having a support system during times of grief explores how having a support network can help us cope with loss.” – Grief and Loss: The Importance of Having a Support System
Try Different Meditation Practices
Meditation is a tool for reducing stress and anxiety. It can help you cope with grief in many ways, including:
- Increasing your ability to focus on the present moment, rather than dwelling on past events or worrying about the future
- Increasing your sense of calmness, which reduces anxiety and stress
- Increasing your self-compassion, which will make you more likely to treat yourself with kindness
Accept That Some Things Are Beyond Your Control
Acceptance is key to coping with grief. You don’t have to like what’s happened or be okay with it, but you do need to accept that things are the way they are and there’s nothing you can do about them.
Acceptance doesn’t mean you don’t care anymore; it just means that instead of trying to change something that can’t be changed, you focus on moving forward with your life and making the most out of it.
Acceptance isn’t the same as resignation either it means accepting reality even though it may not be ideal.
Resignation would involve giving up hope for improvement or change in the future (or possibly even giving up on yourself), whereas acceptance allows for a certain level of adaptability so that one day, when circumstances improve again, you will still be able to handle them.
Take Care Of Basic Needs
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s important to take care of yourself. If you don’t eat well or get enough sleep, your mind and body will be too tired to handle the stress that comes with grief.
Try eating a healthy diet that includes plenty of fruits and vegetables, drinking lots of water daily (but not too much), getting regular exercise (30 minutes per day is great), and taking breaks from work or other activities if they’re causing more stress than they’re worth.
“Mindfulness is a powerful tool that can help us find peace and solace during times of grief. Our article on finding peace and solace through mindfulness explores how mindfulness can help us manage our grief and find moments of calm in the midst of pain.” – Finding Peace and Solace Through Mindfulness
Create A Grief Ritual To Express Your Emotions
As you process your emotions, create a ritual that allows you to express those feelings. You can craft a ceremony for yourself or with others who are grieving.
Rituals offer a way to express emotion and make it real. Rituals can also help keep us connected to others who are grieving and foster compassion within ourselves and in others.
Create Space In Your Life For Grief And Other Strong Emotions
Find a quiet place to be alone. Turn off your phone, disconnect from social media and just be with yourself for a while.
Some people like to sit cross-legged on the floor, others prefer to lie down or sit in a chair with their eyes closed.
Whatever way you choose to do it, it’s important that the space is comfortable so you can relax into whatever feelings come up without distraction or interruption and then stay there as long as you need to!
If possible, try not to eat or drink too close before this time; otherwise, go ahead and snack on something healthy if it makes sense for the moment (some people find comfort in eating tasty treats during these times).
Take time each day (or night) to reflect on what you are feeling. It may help if you do this in silence or with gentle music playing softly nearby; just make sure whatever else goes on around you won’t distract from what matters most:
Allowing yourself some time alone while also being fully present within that solitude openly experiencing whatever emotions arise within your mind-body experience without judging them as good/bad or right/wrong…just being fully immersed within them until they pass away again…then maybe coming back here soon because there’s always more work left undone when we move through this world together!
“Self-care is an essential aspect of managing grief and finding healing. Our article on the healing power of self-care for grief explores how self-care practices can help us cope with the pain of loss and find moments of comfort and healing.” – The Healing Power of Self-Care for Grief
| Approach | Description |
|---|---|
| Journaling | Writing down your thoughts and emotions can help you process them and make more sense of them. |
| Meditative practice | Engaging in mindfulness or meditation practices can help you create space for your emotions and observe them without judgment. |
| Art therapy | Engaging in creative pursuits like painting, drawing, or writing can help you express your emotions in a healthy and constructive way. |
| Outdoor activities | Spending time in nature and engaging in outdoor activities can help you create space for your emotions and find peace and solace in natural surroundings. |
| Self-care | Engaging in self-care activities like getting enough sleep, eating well, and taking time to relax can help you create space for your emotions and cope with grief in a healthy way. |
Use Journaling To Connect With Your Emotions
Journaling is one of the most effective ways to process emotions and make sense of your thoughts and feelings. It can help you feel better, find meaning in life, and connect with others.
Journaling also has a number of other benefits:
It gives you a chance to talk through problems with a neutral third party who isn’t sharing the same bias as you or anyone else involved in the situation.
You’ll be able to see things more clearly by writing them down instead of holding onto them in your mind where they may feel overwhelming at times (like after work).
Express Gratitude For What You Have And The People Who Support You
There is no denying that grief can be an isolating experience. When you’re suffering loss, it’s easy to get wrapped up in your own head and forget about the people who love and support you. This can make recovery feel even more difficult than it already does.
Grief is something that we all have to deal with at some point in our lives, but when we are faced with a significant loss, it can feel like more than just another challenge to overcome it can leave us feeling like we’ve lost control of our lives altogether.
That’s why knowing how to cope with grief is so important and one of the best ways for coping with grief is by expressing gratitude for what we have: for ourselves; for those close to us; and even for all those things beyond our control (like weather patterns).
By expressing gratitude, we bring ourselves back into the present moment where there’s still joy waiting around every corner if only we open up our eyes!
Use Music To Connect With More Positive Emotions And Memories
Listen to music that connects you with positive emotions and memories.
There are plenty of ways to connect with the good times when someone you love has passed away, but one way is by listening to music from those times. The tunes will remind you of those years spent together and help create a happy memory for you both. Music is also great for helping you unwind after a long day or just to relax at home before bedtime.
Use Physical Activity To Help Process Emotions And Improve Well-Being
The practice of mindfulness can be difficult, but it can also be one of the best ways to cope with grief. Mindfulness is simply being fully in the moment, without judgment or expectation. It helps us process feelings and thoughts, which can make us feel better about ourselves and our lives.
One way that we can practice mindfulness is by taking part in physical activity; this will help us release endorphins that make us feel happier and more relaxed as well as helping with sleep and stress reduction. Exercise has also been shown to boost self-esteem, reduce stress levels and even aid weight loss!
Get Professional Help If You Need It
If you feel like you need professional help, don’t be afraid to go out and find it. The person or people you talk to can be a great source of support for your grieving journey.
But as with all things, it’s important to find someone who is a good fit for you.
You might have to try out several different therapists before finding the exact right one for your situation. Don’t give up!
There are many options available when it comes to getting help from a professional: online counseling services, in-person therapy sessions at local mental health agencies and hospitals (find them through Google), etc..
Conclusion
The death of someone you love is one of the most painful experiences in life. It’s important to remember that this pain will not last forever, but you do need to give yourself time and space to heal.
Grief is a journey, not an overnight fix. You’ll be able to use these mindfulness techniques more easily if you practice them daily or at least weekly before trying them during times of high stress or grief.
The more familiar they become for you, the easier it will be for your brain and body to respond when needed!
Further Reading
Here are some additional resources on mindfulness and coping with grief:
Mindfulness Strategies to Cope with Loss: This article from Healthline provides practical mindfulness strategies to help cope with grief and loss.
5 Mindfulness Strategies You Can Adopt to Help with Grief and Loss: This article from Better Humans offers additional mindfulness strategies that can be helpful when dealing with grief.
FAQs
What is mindfulness?
Mindfulness is a state of being fully present and engaged in the current moment. It involves paying attention to one’s thoughts, feelings, and sensations without judgment.
How can mindfulness help with grief?
Mindfulness can help individuals cope with grief by providing tools to manage difficult emotions, reducing stress, and increasing feelings of calm and well-being.
What are some mindfulness practices that can help with grief?
Examples of mindfulness practices that can help with grief include meditation, deep breathing, body scans, and mindful movement.
Is mindfulness a form of therapy?
While mindfulness can be a component of certain types of therapy, such as mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT), it is not a therapy in and of itself.
Can mindfulness cure grief?
Mindfulness cannot cure grief, but it can be a helpful tool in managing the difficult emotions that come with loss and can contribute to a greater sense of well-being over time.
My name is Hellen James. I’m a grief and loss recovery expert who has helped people across the country to move beyond their grief and move forward with their lives.
